Hello out there -- This is the first wedding related blog entry that I will be posting and i want to give a little bit of background to my engagement situation so that you know where I am coming from as I divulge my many experiences to you. Ok, the duration of our engagement at its finally will be about 5 1/2 months, so I have had to work steadily to make sure that everything will be ready in time, and I am planning the wedding from a different city than where the wedding will be held so a lot of the prep. has been phone calls and emails. Now that I have set that up for you I will get right into it. I have decided (after great thought) that the topic of my first 'Wedding Blog' will appropriately be - 'Engagement Butterflies'
Ok well Engagement Butterflies can be defined in a whole lot of ways and the definition also changes as the engagement progresses. I am aware of this and so I have decided to narrow it down to the few main definitions that have applied to me over the past 5 months.

Butterfly stage 1. -- Woah this was the best kind of butterflies I have ever felt. The proposal that began my engagement took place on the golf course, as I went to retrieve my ball after putting it into the last hole to my extreme surprise there right beside my golf ball was a little black velvet box as I looked up at my boyfriend he was down on his knee reaching for my hand -- 'loss of breath and complete astonishment' is how I define the first stage of engagement butterflies. This stage lasted quite some time, breakfast after the event at which neither he nor I could eat more than a bite, lead to complete silence as we drove up to the cottage (nathan asked me if i was all right about 5 times, a quiet non talking girlfriend is quite out of the ordinary to him), as this stage began to wear off I began to enter
Butterfly stage 2. -- excitement expressed through verbal overload. Yes once the shock wore off I could not shut my mouth, every person I saw immediately became victim to the engagement story being spewed from my mouth. I got on the phone to all of my closest friends and shared the news with them. There was no way that story would get old to me. I admit i tried to play the not so excited no big deal card but I'm sure it didn't work as I was completely unable to hide the huge grin upon being congratulated. This stage has been a reoccurring one as various big events have happened throughout the engagement. Buying my wedding dress, My first shower, buying our wedding bands, things like this have caused nathan to say 'oh maan look at your face'.
Butterflies state 3. -- Now as the engagement has progressed, there have been some nervous engagement butterflies. While working through the many details and plans I have had some nervous stomach butterfly moments. When receiving the quote from the caterer, a bit of nervousness there in terms of budge expectations, while making lists and lists and lists of all the minor details that need to be done i definitely felt a bit nervous that things would not get done in time, or nervous about who I could ask to do the various tasks. Nervous about having to keep everyone happy, and at the same time trying to be conscious of my bridzilla scale. (trying to avoid exceeding a 3 or 4 on the scale). As I am drawing near to the end of my engagement I would say that the one piece of advice I can share is to make lists of things that need to get done within certain time frames. I made a list for each week of what needed to be done and did not even glance at the next list until the next week. This helped me to manage the number of things i was working on at one time and allowed me to give my full attention to the items that needed to be done at that time. This also ensured that nothing would be left too late. Caterer needed to be booked 4 months in advance, so it was on the 4 month list, flowers on the other hand 1 month so they are on a different list and I have not looked at them until now. This stage will probably become the most stressful and overwhelming one, however with lots of hot baths, delegation, and micro management the stress can be kept to a minimum (seriously no lie)
Butterflyies stage 4 -- the last stage i would say is a much different one. just the feeling of contentment and excitement for the future. I am down to the last month or so and we have found our house that we will rent, know where we want to live and have received some items for our home (from showers and such). These events have made it feel very real and close and as the planning draws to a close I am amazed at how content I feel. Knowing that the new stage of life is fast approaching the craziness can whirl around as I stand and watch it all happen. Everything somehow gets done and sometimes I feel like i don't even remember making it happen... as I prepare to move, find and start a new job, all pivotal moments in ones life i can't help but thing how well it all seems to be fitting together.

A new Series

Hey Everyone,
Well I don't know if there actually is anyone who reads this so I may not be speaking to 'everyone' but whatever. I created this blog some time ago when I was noticing that at various points in my life i would have something that I wanted to talk about in some form other than my journal... soo I have not written in quite some time and the reason for this is that my life has turned into a bit of a whirlwind. The weekend of May 18th (Victoria Day weekend) I was proposed to by my one and only Nathan. Yes it was a surprise to me, a welcome one of course -- and since then the wheels have kicked in to high gear and I have been going hard. I have recently been inspired to get back into the blog world however and have realized that I do need to make time for the things I like to do. So, how do I keep going on the many many many many tasks that I have to get done and still do this blogging thing???? of course-- BLOG about the blessed event!!
So this begins my series of wedding related blogs. I know that this topic will only be interesting for a small group of readers but to those of you I hope you can relate, learn some tips, and find solace in my words to come. And you dudes...may be able to learn a bit of what your wife to be is going through, or perhaps score some points with her through my words;)

The Loads We Carry

This is a post I have wanted to write for a long time, even before I had a blog i though that this topic would be something I would want to write about. I have been working down town for the past while and have noticed that people are always carrying so much junk around. Book bags, brief cases, purses, computers ect. Everyone looks sooo weighed down. I came to this realization when I found myself having to carry two cakes, my book bag and my over night bag on the bus, subway, and street car (my daily commute I might add). Being the over energetic person that I am, I found myself committed to bringing a cake to work for a colleagues last day and a cake to the first night of youth. As I struggled through the bustling crowd I realized that the load that I was carrying for that one day was what most people were lugging around the city every single day of their lives. Now I know I may be heading down a bit of a corny road here but I just can't help myself.

As I was heading to work I began to think about all of these people and their heavy loads they were carrying and thought about the fact that these external loads may very well be symbols of their internal weight. These people work so hard at their jobs and on their fashion every single day, and for what? To try and make that internal weight go away. To feel lifted up. Ok I need to intervene her and let you all know that I am not pointing any fingers here and I am coupling myself right in there with these people, I mean come on Two cakes... really.

My thoughts kept swirling around in this out of control spiral and I began to think of the homeless people and how they have their grocery bags and grocery carts full of garbage. This too is their symbolic load. I just felt really broken. We don't need to carry a load, there is someone to carry it for us, we just need to realize and accept that. All of us. And the question is how do we let people know this? Maybe we need to help people carry their loads sometimes, 'mine is a little lighter right now, why don't you give me some of yours' It's just a matter of being open to doing this, to helping.... and helping anyone not just friends.

I'm sure there are ways of helping that I'm not even aware of. So I guess I'm saying I want to be open, to being taught how to help... and help anyone...

The Winter Tuck

January 15, 2007, Southwestern Ontario finally feels the winter chill. It was a long awaited event, though not highly anticipated by most. The city was running quite well without the slush and muck that ushers in the winter weather. Minimal bus and street car delays(which i must say is a rant for another time), highway traffic busy as usual but no disastrous accidents. All in working order.
I do have to admit, I am one of the few who get excited for winter. I simply adore the white flakes that fall so elagently from the sky, and the crisp feeling of the cold air in my lungs as I walk outside. However this year I found myself not missing the winter wonderland so much. I think this has to do with the new found hour long commute (each way) that I make both morning and night on my way to and from work. On my recent chilly walks, in spite of my extremely warm, knee length, down filled winter jacket I have been experiencing a sharp touch of cold air around my mid drift. This feeling is one I considered important of ridding, as once chilled I find it impossible to warm up again. This is where I introduce to you "The Winter Tuck" I don't claim to have invented said tuck, however I do claim to be a strong supporter of it. The past two mornings I have added an extra layer to my ensemble, one that is not too thick that I will feel hot while sitting in the office, and obviously long enough to tuck in. A good example of the ideal extra layer would be a cotton/nylon stretch tank from Old Navy $12.00. The added item has brought me great comfort and has taken that sharp chill right away. I would suggest you all give it a go.